Sunday Soul – I Carry Your Heart

POSTSCRIPT:

Edward Estlin Cummings – Estlin to his family, and simply e.e. to his readers – signed up for the Norton-Harjes Ambulance Corps during the first world war and travelled to Paris with his Harvard chum Don Dos Passos and discovered there that not only did he not hate the germans, but that he so disagreed with war that he felt universal sympathy for all involved. His letters home raised the attention of the secret police and he was arrested by the French Military and held in a concentration camp under suspicion of espionage for close to four months. Upon his release Cummings returned to the United States where he was summarily drafted into the Army as a foot soldier, and spent the remained of the war in Massachusetts writing what F. Scott Fitzgerald would call the only notable novel to be produced after 1920 – The Enormous Room – because the few who cause books to live have not been able to endure the thought of the work’s morality.

An ardent bohemian to all appearances, after a trip to the Soviet Union following the Russian revolution, Cummings took a crisp turn to the right, emerging as a Republican, and an ardent supporter of Joseph McCarthy — the complete cock-sucker who decided to undertake a witch hunt in the 1950’s to ferret out anyone who was even remotely suspected of liberal, communist or any other sympathies beyond those of the right wing Christian political movement we are still enduring today. Despite his personal politics and point of view, Cummings continued to thrive as illustrator and essayist for Vanity Fair magazine (which at the time was actually a bohemian bible, and not the worthlessly bourgeois rag it grew up to be.)

On the outside he maintained his liberal look and feel, living off the proceeds of his youthful poetry about love, and coping with the loss of his father (killed instantly be an oncoming locomotive) and his mother who reportedly “never partook in stereotypically ‘feminine’ things” whilst he clearly corroded inside, and died many years before he left this earthly experience.

The things which crash up against our hearts in life have a way of breaking us apart. The ego-mind argues that these experiences are trauma, and we must somehow regain the footing we once held. So reluctant to grow and change, so distractible we are by mortgages, health concerns, fears, doubts, and things that we lose ourselves in the standards of a world which has been trained, honed, culled, and refined by nothing more than television commercials. We betray our bright and mighty hearts so freely, without a thought. We travel with the herd, and the mob of counter-cultural revolution dims into electronic device obsessed cubicle workers, remembering their dreams over an extra large glass of wine at semi annual gatherings of what few friends we still know from our wild days.

We call this “growing up.” Many people even look backward at their lives and actually regret the views they held in their youth, knowing now as adults that what they believed and did in their younger days was childish, unrealistic and even silly. Others do — it’s true — look back with fondness from a distance, and yet by example, others who never lay down their banners and torches seem assenine at best don’t they? I mean the only thing worse than an old guy at a club hitting on women more than half his age is an antique radical who never grew out her mohawk, and still believes that the world is watching, and that they speak the language of everyone around them — even though they furiously disagree.

It seems to me that this growth, this change, these juxtapositions, the shifts and challenges which arrive along our paths are not obstacles meant to dislodge us from our narrow tracts, are acts of love and kindness from the universe. Opportunities to grieve the loss of ourselves, our former ideas, come in many forms. Sometimes the challenge is good news, a windfall of cash, or a wonderful job. Sometimes we are challenged by grief, the loss of love, or health. Regardless of the impasse, the hero’s journey is one of faith, courage, and durability. We begin this path barely able to discern our own hearts, or know our own minds – let alone our bodies – and we must learn, with quiet love, to turn our faces to the breeze, and embrace each challenge as it arrives, carrying nothing, leaving everything behind as we journey onward. If this were easy, I feel certain that sweet Estlin might have departed this life the warrior of love and champion of hearts he set out to be. If this were easy then we would all be carrying each other’s hearts inside our heart of hearts, and weeping with joy that it’s only our love that keeps the stars apart.

I wanted to carry your heart for a while tonight. I wanted to express in gentle terms, blatantly sexual terms, theoretical terms, and with rhythm, lyric, and tender whispers what an honor it is to see you, to know you, to love you.

That said, here is the track listing for Sunday Soul – i carry your heart:

1. Sunday Soul – Program ID
2. Procedere – Bocca Grande
* introduction
3. Straight to the Point – Malistix Remix – Isabelle Antena
* i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart) – ee cummings
4. Anjuna – Darren Gregory
* i feel, i hear, i see
5. Keep On – Andy Hart
* it’s the end of the world tonight
6. Dayshift – Oliver’s Nightshift Remix – Juan Atkins
* the journey home
7. Never Let Me Go – Aeroplane Remix – The Human League
8. Errol Flynn – Bottin Mix – Nassau
9. Party Girl РDerek Turcios Blue Note Mix РUltra Nat̩
10. Gone – Harrison Crump
11. Cosmic Love – Morgan Page Bootleg Remix – Florence + The Machine
12. I Don’t Feel Anything – Anja Schneider
* I feel everything
13. Ulysses – Beyond The Wizard’s Sleeve Remix – Franz Ferdinand
14. Transitions – Sunshine’s No Voice At All Version – Dennis Ferrer
15. Look Right Through – Vox – Storm Queen
16. Believe – Instrumental Mix – Trick & Kubic
* the romance of your fingertips
17. Fragment – Galaxy
18. I Go Deep – Jim Rivers
* i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart) – ee cummings
19. The Absurdity of Possession – Sunshine Jones *
* the admission of vulnerability
20. Holding You – Ame Mix – Wahoo
* going down on you
21. North East – El Carlitto
* at home beside you
22. Why Does The Wind – Andre Lodemann Remix – Tracey Thorn
23. Time After Time – Lesale
24. We Are Ready – instrumental – Proper Heat
25. Ice Castle – The Beat Broker
26. Move On feat. Georg Levin – Jimpster’s House Dub Mix – Random Factor
27. Fill Up My Heart – Sunshine Jones *
28. Rolling in the Deep – Keljet Remix – Adele
29. Wavy Gravy – Sasha
* i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart) – ee cummings
30. Pantha du Prince – Asha
* fall down
31. I Got Your Back – Sunshine Jones
32. Days Like This – Spinna Tickla Remix – Shaun Escoffery
33. Miss You – Lulu Rouge Remix – Trentemøller
34. Sunday Soul – Program ID
35. Breathe Me – Live – Zero 7
36. Sunday Soul – Program ID

Total Running Time: 03 Hours 51 Minutes 37 Seconds
* Performed Live

March 27, 2011